My feet prefer air

by Nikita L Maritz
(Mthatha, Eastern Cape, South Africa)

My feet prefer the air over air filling these lungs,
It tends to feel as heavy as the guilt I have over things I haven't done.

My feet prefer the air over touching the ground, My footsteps symbolized goodness and the willingness to go the extra mile for those I loved and those I didn't even know.

But I was "Oscar'd" and barely offered sympathy or prosthetics when I cried a "Reeva" of feeling alone.
You see, I always feel alone.

I feel like feeling has become a place of misery that always feels like home

and I need a home.

My feet prefer the air so I can walk a path of relief. Ever felt like you're drowning while watching everyone else as they take a sigh of relief?

Ever felt like your soul desperately wants to die but it can't, because it's contained in a body that has another fifty years to live?

It's like standing in the middle of a collapsing bridge with numerous chances to run to either side, but both ends seem so happy
and you're not worthy of such a thing,
But you're equally scared of dying- and so you place your decisions all in the hands of your instincts- only for an ambulance to drive into that bridge: finding a note and a slit wrist.

My feet prefer the air because it's a little softer for my soles, see my soul is attached to warmth and words, so I wrote.

I authored my escape by creating a haven of relevant issues for everyone to find a place.
Art, to me, is God.

The page is my birth place and the ink flows like the Nile. Upon it, lays a stream of African cries about their poverty ridden lives, streams of tears emanating from romantic lies and why love is a lie.

Art, to me, is like me standing in front of an ocean of everything/everyone I lost, as I watch more of them wave goodbye.

Even the Sky wants to leave.

And so, my feet need the air because only then can I truly breathe. One kick of the chair and I'm hanging in the joy of finally feeling free

Flowers

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Jul 27, 2018
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thank you
by: NL Maritz

Thank you Dana

Jul 27, 2018
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by: Dana

Nikita ... thank you for sharing a part of your soul with me and my visitors. That said, my hope for you is that you can find a way to heal so that you can be one of those people that are happy, joyful and at peace ... while fulfilling their life's journey here on earth.

Please don't give up. Find the help you need to face your demons head on and get passed this once and for all. There is help. There is hope!

My hope for you is that you realize how amazing you are and that you have gifts to share with the world. I hope you will embrace those gifts and live a meaningful, fulfilling life.

Namaste, love and light,

Dana

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