Depression, My Old Friend

by Swati Sanguri
(New Delhi, India)



Darkness my old friend
you were there when no one was
the hand once held will not be left
That was the promise you made
This is the promise you have kept
Oh yes, I slip to the dark side so often
Here everything is dark
The sun shine pricks my eyes now

I am my light and I am my own dark
When I see the moon
I see the shadows
I look at the Sun
and I feel the sorrows
The sky above is dark again
I should know if I have to fight
I should better know what for I have to fight
Not a brink of light

The tunnel is dark and damp
Darkest of dark - the deepest shade
The colors don't matter now
for they no longer exist
I am my life and my own peril
Have I not ploughed and struggled?
fought and battled...?

Shush all the noise and leave me alone
the empty existence has started crawling again
shut off the world...I am sitting in a corner

I wish it was so different
when I see the smiles around
I wish that I was spared
It is not about love. It is not about this life
it is something beyond from past
which haunts me till night

How shall I lose my mind, tell me
should I go berserk?
Should I stare in the darkness?
and go oblivious of my existence?
Should I take a pill right now?
Should I shut off eyes again and go back to sleep


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Swati,

Thank you for coming to my site and sharing your poem with my visitors. I'm wondering, how are you doing now? Are you still struggling? If so, have you reached out to someone that can support you?

Depression is such a crazy thing to have to deal with. So many complex layers that eventually leads to such strong feelings of sadness, hopelessness and despair. That said, please know that this is not a disease. It's not something that you have to live with the rest off your life. You can overcome this and go on to live a happy, fulfilling life! You can live a life that excites you ... one that you are excited to wake up to everyday!

I hope that you have found a path that will lead you back into the light so that you can the happy life you deserve to live.

Please tell me how you're doing?

All the best,

Dana

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