Ray of Lght

by Mikaela Webster
(United Kingdom)

So I’ve been struggling with depression,

There’s no price that can be paid no concession,
I had been feeling so very low,
Yet I just couldn’t let people know,
How could I be feeling like this,
To get out of this hole was my only wish,
But I could hardly be bothered to get out of bed,
There was just too much swirling round in my head,
I thought there would never be any hope,
When I looked for motivation my mind just said nope,
I couldn’t understand what I had become,
How could I no longer be interested in doing a sum,
Mathematics once filled me with joy,
It used to be better than playing with a toy,
But now I just couldn’t be bothered,
Because my demons had grown they now hovered,
My life was absolutely no fun,
In dreamland I had a much better one,
So that’s where I wanted to stay,
That’s where I could be happy and play,
I couldn’t even describe what I was feeling,
It was just pain with no hope of healing,
I thought my life would soon be over,
Because this pain was too much to handle sober,
And I’m not really one to touch a drink,
Because that would just be another way to sink,
Losing my passion is what hurt the most,
I couldn’t handle living life just to coast,
I needed help there’s no need to say,
But I don’t believe in god so I wasn’t going to pray,
I did find help right here on Earth,
I guess it started with an internet surf,
In this dark place there were others too,
That’s quite sad but of course it’s true,
They suggested a path I should follow,
That might give me a ray of light for tomorrow,
I didn’t think anything could improve my life,
But it was worth a try before resorting to the knife,
So I went and told my GP,
He said a counsellor I should see,
I did though I was quite afraid,
But my life I think he did help to save,
I met him and we talked it all through,
He really didn’t judge me it’s true,
Then I met an awesome friend,
Who for advice I could always depend,
Oh my god they accepted me,
They knew what I was like and they didn’t flee,
With them life didn’t seem so bad,
That I met them I will be eternally glad,
Here I am I’m still alive,
Sometimes my mood does take a dive,
And the future doesn’t always seem so bright,
But now it’s different I can see that ray of light.