Help

I feel like our relationship has problems. and not sure what to do. We do argue quite a bit over stupid stuff and mainly it's job issues and money is stressful.


My stress causes me not wanting to have sex cuz I'm tired and cannot wrap my head around making anyone happy because I'm not happy.

I don't know what I want to do with my life. It seems like money is about everything. I don't want to live like that I'd rather be happy and work part time.

I am worried that I won't have enough patience as a mother and will create more stress. I'm worried Derek will move on and be like this girl doesn't have her ducks in a row.

I love derek very much and he will make an amazing dad. He is very supportive. he helps with supper! and is patient. I'm thinking I'm not good enough for him cuz I got insecurities and not sure what I want out of life.

Plus I feel like I've done a lot of damage with our relationship already that I don't know how to fix and get over. I guess I just feel guilty and why did I ruin something perfect?

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Thanks for reaching out! I hope I can help if even just a little.

First of all, no relationship is perfect! They all have hills and valleys, ups and downs. It is not the issues that can negatively impact a relationship, it is how those issues are handled.

If they are dealt with in a loving, supportive way it helps to build more respect into a relationship. The reverse is true if they are resolved with anger and blame. However, either way, all problems offer us a way to grown and learn from life and learn about ourselves.

Open communication is so important in a relationships. Claim what you need and want and give to your partner in a loving, kind way with the intent of bringing you closer together.

In life and relationhships, you can not change what has happened. You can only learn from them and make better choices going forward.

Feeling down and frustrated is a common symptom to life's stress and it sounds like you have plenty of it! Do you have a friend you can lean on for support? Someone that can help you process some of these feelings? Someone who can tell you that you are amazing inspite of your mistakes (because you are)?

Sounds like Derek is very supportive which is the foundation of any good relationship. Consider talking to him about how you feel. He might surprise you and it could really change your relationship in a positive way!

Wishing you all the best,

Dana

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